Grief

John 11:32-38 Now when Mary came to where Jesus was and saw him, she fell at his feet, saying to him, "Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died." When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews that had come with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in his spirit and greatly troubled. And he said "where have you laid him?" They said to him, "Lord, come and see." Jesus wept. So the Jews said, "see how he loved him." But some of them said, "Could not he who opened the eyes of the blind man also have kept this man from dying?" Then Jesus, deeply moved again, came to the tomb. (ESV)

Jesus was troubled? What does that mean? Jesus responded to grief in a powerful way. He responded to their weeping with weeping. He felt their pain (don't you dare laugh). Really! ... One of the things I often think about and struggle with in regards to the Bible is understanding different people's moods when they are speaking. Are they mad, being sarcastic, being silly, judging, mocking? One would think that Mary and Martha might be mad at Jesus, but it doesn't appear so. They trust him implicitly, but they also miss their brother. They know that Jesus could have saved their brother, but instead of beating him up, they accept the death with the knowledge that whatever Jesus is doing and has done is right. Even though it feels horrible.

That is what I see in Mary. Is that what Jesus responds to? The sheer pain? The trust in spite of the pain? Does Jesus identify with that loss, because he feels that loss moment by moment for millions of his dead and dying brothers and sisters, and likewise God for his children? How bittersweet. Pain is part of life. Love comes with pain. Pain is a part of love. Grief is something we all share. It is not a failing, a weakness, or something to be hidden. It is part of living and loving and sharing yourself with others.