Lies

Romans 1: 21-25 "For although they knew God, they neither glorified him as God nor gave thanks to him, but their thinking became futile and their foolish hearts were darkened. Although they claimed to be wise, they became fools and exchanged the glory of the immortal God for images made to look like mortal man and birds and animals and reptiles. Therefore God gave them over in the sinful desires of their hearts to sexual impurity for the degrading of their bodies with one another. They exchanged the truth of God for a lie, and worshiped and served created things rather than the Creator-who is forever praised. Amen." NIV

Why does it seem so easy to believe lies? It should be fairly hard in light of the wonders of the world around us and even in us, in our own bodies and in the food we eat and the emotions we feel. God's handy work is all around us, but so often we see his beautiful creation as a part of the mundane. It's just a tree, nothing special. It's just me, nobody important. We start to believe lies when we, as Paul says, stop glorifying God and giving thanks to Him, recognizing Him and paying attention to the little details and the greater story of our lives and creation, the gospel. We don't make traditional idols for ourselves, but we elevate and worship things above God just the same. The created things, like tv where we waste time, or our schedules, or even our work, knitting, reading. Anything that distracts us from God and takes our focus off of him is an idol. But God is bigger than us, and he knows that we need him. He "will never leave us nor forsake us." He has given us his power, the power to fight back and to resist the idols of this world.

Spring Break! "Causin' trouble all over the world!"

Acts 17:6 "'These men who have caused trouble all over the world have now come here.'"

This week is spring break week, and also the week of our road trips at church. I am so excited. I am staying in town, but I hope that someday someone will say this about us. Isn't that an awesome observation! "Trouble all over the world!" The apostles and other disciples were having an impact that people recognized. There was indeed some trouble! People were getting riled up! Their reaction to the apostles was just spreading the Word farther though! This is an interesting section of Acts. The trouble quote comes from a man in Thessalonica, but earlier when they were in Philippi, there had been a young woman following them around and yelling that they were "servants of the Most High God, who are telling you the way to be saved." (16:17) Paul is so "troubled" that he casts the demon out of her that causes her to "tell the future." We are to be bold, but in the words of Jon Foreman, there shouldn't be a "show." The conversations in Acts are all very organic. The Apostles preach Jesus in the synagogue. They give help to beggars and those seeking healing. They answer the questions of their jailers. These aren't the guys on most college campuses who are yelling at students that their skirts are too short, that they are evil sinners, and they need to repent. These are men meeting people where they are, in moments of pain, in simple conversation about life and religion. :) God help us to follow their example, to be bold, but not judgmental. To be bold and loving.

Random thoughts... on Acts 1-8ish.

The gospel is personal, and God is a personal God. He gets all up in people's business. He challenges individuals with specific purposes. He answers their questions. He tells them what to do. Often his instructions are to do the very same thing. Ananias, go to Saul, get in his business. He's a stranger, but I'm going to have you help him help me.

On Acts: Part 1

Acts 1:7-8 He said to them, "It is not for you to know times or epochs which the father has fixed by his own authority; but you will receive power when the Holy Spirit has come upon you; you shall be my witnesses both in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and even to the remotest part of the earth."

You will, you shall. I love it! They will be witnesses, according to Strong's, "in a legal sense, an historical sense, and in an ethical sense" as martyrs. This is not a suggestion, this is Christ, God telling them what is going to happen. "You will receive." According to Strong's, this is not just an I'm going to send you something in the mail type of verb, this is an active verb on the disciple's part, they are "a. to take with the hand, lay hold of, [this power] in order to use it. 1. to take up a thing to be carried, 2. to take upon one's self...c. to take what is one's own, to take to one's self. to make one's own." (#2983) They are going to be given God's power to make their own, in order that they might be his witnesses and glorify Him. They are given the power to be as Christ was and is. Strong's describes the ethical sense of being a witness as one who follows in the footsteps of Christ, those who die as he did for their faith, their knowledge, their truth.

Acts 1:14 "These all with one mind were continually devoting themselves to prayer, along with the women." They were all talking to God. That along is "with" and comes from the word for union.

One of the things I've been thinking about as I've been reading Acts, is the idea that they were witnesses. They testified about the gospel in a very culturally relevant way. First, with the Holy Spirit they spoke in different languages, languages that were recognized by people in the crowd. The Holy Spirit allowed them to speak in this way directly to certain people who were present. Christ is personal. Christ, the power of God, was revealed to them in a language they could hardly misunderstand. It was an amazingly cool, powerful experience. It showed off the strength of the power the Holy Spirit could give. These people were on the whole ordinary people, fishermen, and instantaneously they were given the knowledge and the words to coherently speak another language and speak truth into the lives of specific members of that crowd. Peter's response to those who mocked God's power as drunkenness, was to testify to all he had seen. He shared the gospel in a way that those in Jerusalem, Jews and others familiar with Jewish custom, would understand it. He quoted the prophets and reminded the crowd of what even they had witnessed in Jerusalem recently. They too were witnesses to a degree.

The 35 Days

So the 35 days (our church's version of Lent) are over, and I am excited about what has happened in my life and my spiritual walk, but I am also eager and anxious about the future. I have decided to attempt a 35 days part two (35X2). Conveniently enough Easter happens to be in 35 days. So right now I am planning on reading through Acts and potentially Luke as well, but I have also been thinking about doing the Lord's Table bible study or a book my mom gave me called Jesus Calling. Not sure which route will ultimately win out. I am also only going to let my self check my messages and the top lists on Facebook twice a day... 15 mins or so after I respond to messages and things.

What God has done: God brought me back to a place where I could see him and I could see myself through his eyes. I was devastated by my father's death. I felt like my life was a disaster and that nothing good could come from me or for me. I was terrified of not knowing what God would want me to do with myself and that I would somehow fail him. The Truth is AMAZING! God really does love us, and our sins have been paid for. He does have a plan for us, and we need to step out boldly in faith believing that he will direct our paths. He has sent us a counselor who will guide us! Sin and death have been defeated. Our sinful natures are made dead through Christ and that truth/promise is a powerful weapon in combatting temptation and fear. Col 3:3 is so powerful.

Sin and the Spirit

Romans 8:10-11 15 "But if Christ is in you, your body is dead because of sin, yet your spirit is alive because of righteousness. And if the spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead is living in you, he who raised Christ from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through his Spirit, who lives in you. ...For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave a gain to fear, but you received the spirit of sonship."

We should be bold in our pursuit of righteousness and the desires of God. "Those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires." Romans 8:8

The scriptures tell us things that are true about ourselves. God gives us directions, yes, we are to "put off our old selves,"(Ephesians 4:22) and "set our minds on the desires of the spirit," but in those statements, there is a sense of reasonable expectation. These are things we are to do, and things that we can do. God, Christ, the Holy Spirit helps us to do these things, we are able to do them because of God. These scriptures are prescriptive and descriptive, and there is power in that. God has given us everything we need to live for him. We are "new creations" with the God given ability to seek after his heart and to walk in faith and righteousness. Nothing is too big for God, and nothing is too big for us.

2 Corinthians 5:17 "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone and the new has come! all this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ."

All NIV

Death, life, and victory. A highlight reel.

Romans 6: 2, 5-6, 11-12 "May it never be! How shall we who died to sin still live in it?!...For if we have been united with Him in the likeness of His death, certainly we shall also be in the likeness of His resurrection, knowing this that our old self was crucified with him, in order that our body of sin might be done away with, so that we would no longer be slaves to sin. ... Even so consider yourselves dead to sin but alive to God in Christ Jesus. Therefore do not let sin reign in you mortal body so that you obey its lusts." NASB, emphasis mine

Colossians 3:2-3 " Set your mind on things above, not on earthly things. For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you also will appear with him in glory. Put to death therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature." NIV, emphasis mine

1 Corinthians 15:54-58

"'Death has been swallowed up in victory.' 'Where, O death, is your sting?' The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law. But thanks be to God! He gives us victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. Therefore, my dear brothers, stand firm. Let nothing move you." NIV, emphasis mine

"I may be down, but I will rise./ It may be dark, but God is light./ Sin has lost its power./ Death has lost its sting./ From the grave you've risen victoriously!/ Into marvelous light I'm running..." - Charlie Hall

Christ has already fought the fight against sin and death and won on our behalf! We can have confidence in our ability to put sin to death, because Christ is right behind us holding the bloody dagger. Our sinful nature will be conquered on the day of Christ! We do not struggle in vain! We can stand tall and push forward knowing we are victors, knowing that "we are more than conquerers." (Romans 8:37) There should be no sense of defeat in us because we are not defeated! Christ has made us ROCKSTARS!

Just People

Acts 9:1-9 "Meanwhile, Saul was still breathing out murderous threats against the Lord's disciples. He went to the high priest and asked him for letters to the synagogues in Damascus, so that if he found any there who belonged to the Way, whether men or women, he might take them as prisoners to Jerusalem."

Sometimes I place the people in the Bible on a pedestal. But these verses remind me of just how human, how real these events were. I love, first of all, the idea that Saul was "breathing out murderous threats." This was what was giving him purpose. It was a constant mode of operation, it was natural to him. Every second of everyday. This passage also reflects the political situation for the Jews. He went to the high priest, who gave him permission to persecute believers, despite the recommendations of his teacher, a very respected member of the spiritual elite, Gamaliel, who had argued that God was in control, and if Jesus was from God they could do nothing about him and if he wasn't the movement would die. The Jewish leaders were scared. They were mad. They were on a mission, not only to protect their faith, but also to protect themselves from the Romans. Finally, "any there that belonged to the Way." The Way might as well be HCBCUT, Craft Group, the Subalterns, a group of people with a common goal, a common passion, working together, connected to one another, friends and family.

Renovations

Ephesians 2:19-22 "Consequently, you are no longer foreigners and aliens, but fellow citizens with God's people and members of God's household, built on the foundation of the apostles and prophets, with Christ Jesus himself as the chief cornerstone. In him the whole building is joined together and rises to become a holy temple in the Lord. And in him you too are being built together to become a dwelling in which God lives by his Spirit." (NIV, my emphasis)

We are being renovated. God has moved us to a new foundation in Christ, and he is adding rooms and wings here and there, and tearing out old appliances and fixtures and rotting boards. We are a dwelling. We are his dwelling. Which means he gets to redecorate, reorganize, and get comfy. Houses can't resist their owners. Houses don't talk back and say nope that plant looks great right were it is. Houses just chill. They reflect the care of their owner. Some houses are falling down because they are neglected and abandoned. Others are shiny and welcoming and wonderfully cozy. God will never "leave us or forsake us." He is at home. He is working around the house keeping it clean and making it better. We are God's domestic to do list. :)

Power and Gifts of Grace

Ephesians 3:20-21, 4:7 "Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever, amen. ... grace was given to each one of us according to the measure of Christ's gift."

Ephesians 1:19-22 "That you may know... his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come."

The same power that raised Christ from the dead, works in us still, works in us as individuals! God is not weakened by use or by exponential growth in the numbers of the faithful. God cares just as much about us as individuals as he cares about defeating sin wholly, once and for all. There is no favoritism here, there is only a God that sees his creation, all, each and every one of his children, being destroyed and dying, and knowing that he is the only one that can bring them home, he moves, he acts, he saves them. Whenever God moves, he moves big, he moves awesomely. I can't even begin to imagine that strength. God is GREAT and he loves us.

"Two things you told me/That you are strong/And you love me" - Jon Foreman, Your Love is Strong

Fear and Loathing

John 16: 13-14 "When the spirit of truth comes, he will guide you into all truth, for he will not speak on his own authority, but whatever he hears he will speak and he will declare to you the things that are to come. He will glorify me, for he will take what is mine and declare it to you."

When the spirit of truth comes, he will... he will not... he will... he will... he will... he will...

These are promises. Promises made by Jesus, by God. By the creator of the universe. By the one who made it possible for my mind to doubt. I have been terrified of listening to the Lord. That I might misinterpret what he is telling me, that I might not do something he wanted me to do, that I might fail him. Which, of course, I have already done, and he has already forgiven. The last two days I have not been very excited. I lapsed into old habits of wasting time and ignoring more pressing decisions that I have put off for fear of making the wrong decision. There is, however, a point at which you have to walk by faith. A point at which we all have to trust to God and believe that "he will guide" us. I have put too much and too little emphasis on listening to God. I have belittled myself and God, by assuming that I would not be able to follow any directions he might send me. There are lots of different ways to listen to God. Some times he speaks audibly and sometimes, we are moved by the spirit and there are no words. I need to stop freaking out about my role as a listener and start living in the freedom that Christ has purchased for me. The holy spirit will declare to me whatever it is God would have me to do. The holy spirit will teach me to "be still, and wait." God will give me the strength to do what he asks. I simply have to trust him.

Active, Risky Listening

"But he who looks intently into the perfect law that gives freedom, and continues to do this, not forgetting what he has heard, but doing it-he will be blessed in what he does." James 1:25

Listening and Mediators

"Once [the Isrealites] learned a little about God, they realized that being in his presence was risky business and told Moses so: 'You speak to us, and we will hear; but let not God speak to us lest we die.' (Exod. 20:19)"

"The history of religion is the story of an almost desperate scramble to have a king, a mediator, a priest, a pastor, a go-between. In this way we do not need to go to God ourselves. Such an approach saves us from the need to change, for to be in the presence of God is to change."

-Richard J. Foster, Celebration of Discipline: The Path to Spiritual Growth

Mr. Foster's words struck a cord with me the moment I read them. This is something I do. I seek out people, mentors, my mother, before turning to God. I assume that he will not answer me, or perhaps that I will not understand his answer, or hear him speaking, so I turn to people. People that I have placed on a pedestal, or respect, or see as a spiritual authority in my life. Jesus says "Seek and ye shall find." It is as simple as that - a promise that he is available to us if we seek him. Listening doesn't seem like seeking, but it is. It is placing yourself in a position to receive advice, to receive knowledge, to receive direction, instruction, and insight. It is a sign of respect. It is a sign of honor. It proves that you find someone worthy. Foster also quotes 1 Samuel 8:7 "They have rejected me from being King over them." This is the Lord speaking! We reject him so often by not listening, by not being available either in body or spirit to follow after him. I don't want to reject anyone even people I don't necessarily like, and yet I have wounded Christ, the most important person in my life, many many times, as I have chosen to impatiently barge ahead instead of asking and then listening to his words. In so doing I have also unknowingly wounded myself. So I will seek and I will find. I will listen, and I will wait.

He "loves like a hurricane" - David Crowder Band

I have been thinking a lot about listening to God lately, and so of course the sermon on Sunday was about listening and the study we are doing tomorrow night is about listening. I don't often try or practice listening. Thinking, pondering, mulling is easy. But listening, being still? Being quiet? I think this is a huge thing. I think this is what God really wants, and He is pursuing it for me. I haven't been sleeping, hence the posting at one in the morning, and I can't help but think that He wants something. That this disquiet has some sort of purpose. Perhaps I am wrong. More prayer, more patience, more seeking. He will make Himself known or conquer the one that is pestering His sheep. I simply need to wait, to rest in His arms, to be close so that I can hear Him. Worry rears its ugly head. Rest. Jesus proved over and over again that He knows what we are thinking, He knows we fall asleep while praying, He knows our racing erratic thoughts that aren't tame enough to pray a straight line, and He knows our fears. Confession and praise. Waiting for the Lord to reveal His plan, waiting and learning to be still and listen.

Serving Others

"[Jesus] has placed people in your life that you are to serve, not because you are inherently less but because, by serving others, you come to be more like Him."

- Melissa Jarmel in The Depths, Hill Country Bible Church UT, 2010

VERGE Part II and III

One of the most important things I think I have taken away from this conference is the idea that while being missional may be painful, it will ultimately be good, and it is not something to be afraid of. This missional lifestyle is something God wants, and there is peace in His will. All of the speakers spoke with an urgency and with passion, but not in fear. I have often gone away from retreats in joy, but also with a deep sense of all of the things that I needed to do or change about my life. I have walked away burdened. This time I am more aware of the things I need to surrender on a daily, moment by moment, basis. The things I need to let God do in me. I have a list of things I think God wants me to do, but I know that if they are not of Him they won't go far. If one of my ideas is selfishly birthed, I need to let it die quickly. Nothing I can do, will do, or don't do can ultimately hinder God. God has already won this battle, and I need to be bold and step out in faith, even if it is scary.

God is taking away the fear that I won't do what He wants me to do, that I will ultimately fail Him. He is changing my heart. He has shown me through the conference, that if I seek Him, lean on the Holy Spirit, and listen to the Spirit, I will be right were He wants me. I will be able to see when He opens a door and when He closes it. I want to be the one, that as Francis Chan says, goes to the beach, looks for the waves of God, and catches them; if He's not moving, I don't want to move either. I need to rest in this truth, the truth that I have access to God and that He wants to share His will with me, I just have to be still enough to listen. I have to get away from the distractions of life and of my own head, and seek him. I need to confess my fear, and let him make a warrior out of me. There will be sacrifice and pain, we are after all trying to emulate Christ. Francis Chan spoke about the joy that Stephen experienced right before he was stoned. Talk about the ultimate in stressful situations! Yet Stephen knew where he was to be and upon whom his eyes were meant to be resting. Stephen was willing to do all things for Christ.

Hugh Halter also talked today about how this calling doesn't "add" anything to our lives. It just changes the way we think about and approach the people around us, the people we come into contact with every single day regardless of whether or not we are on mission. We need to see them, to see their needs, and love them and meet their needs.

Jesus rocked the boat!

One of the things that I was challenged by tonight was that Jesus and the members of the early church rocked the boat. They were radical, but it made sense. I have rarely been radical in my life. I have always been too afraid of breaking the rules and upsetting other people. Jesus broke the rules! He healed on the sabbath and did all of these things that "good" Jews didn't do. He hung out with sinners, women, and Samaritans. He made people mad. He made important people mad! He confronted people. I am supposed to be like Jesus. I am not supposed to have a cookie cutter life in the suburbs were everyone likes me and thinks I'm "so nice." I am supposed to live the truth! I am supposed to do what God calls me to even if it "isn't safe." Even if people think I am crazy.

I am guilty of "domesticating Jesus" to quote Alan Hirsch again. I have made Him fit my warm fuzzy needs, but have not thought seriously about the call he has placed on my life to share the gospel with others. The real gospel, the gospel of truth and love. I have been ashamed of the gospel. Especially when it would bring me under the microscopic gaze of academics. Father God, forgive me for living in fear and denying you, take away my fear and make me bold for you, let the only person I strive to please be you!

VERGE!

Verge was awesome! http://verge2010.org/ God is awesome!

Jesus is Lord!

"Jesus is good, but Jesus is not safe (pause) not if you want to live the middle class lifestyle. " ~ Alan Hirsch Jesus requires things of us. He is a ruler, he is a king! He asks us to step out of our comfort zones and LOVE people!

Francis Chan! God moved tonight! In the hearts of a group of people in Cedar Park, TX! Chan challenged us to think about what the bible says the group of believers should do and be. How does the bible describe the church? It is nothing like what we see today, in America! The early believers were excited, and they went forth and told everyone they came into contact with that Jesus was alive. They did not simply gather together behind closed doors for their own benefit! They went out they shared the news that we are eternal beings! That Jesus was the messiah! Chan challenged us to let God be God, not to be content with doing what we've always done, what we have been taught to do, but to follow God, follow the Holy Spirits leading to become the people and the churches God would have us to be. The Bible, God's word! Our User's Manual! Let it lead us to the heart of God, let it lead our relationships! Church is not about doing the right thing, attendance does not atone for sin, and we are not called to seclude ourselves from the world, but instead to be in it working and sharing and loving people! We are to act as avatars of the Holy Spirit and Jesus!

So excited!

Psalm 119 - one to memorize

Psalm 119: 35-37

"Lead me in the path of your commandments, for I delight in it.

Incline my heart to your testimonies and not to selfish gain.

Turn my eyes from looking at worthless things; and give me life in your ways."

Grief

John 11:32-38 Now when Mary came to where Jesus was and saw him, she fell at his feet, saying to him, "Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died." When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews that had come with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in his spirit and greatly troubled. And he said "where have you laid him?" They said to him, "Lord, come and see." Jesus wept. So the Jews said, "see how he loved him." But some of them said, "Could not he who opened the eyes of the blind man also have kept this man from dying?" Then Jesus, deeply moved again, came to the tomb. (ESV)

Jesus was troubled? What does that mean? Jesus responded to grief in a powerful way. He responded to their weeping with weeping. He felt their pain (don't you dare laugh). Really! ... One of the things I often think about and struggle with in regards to the Bible is understanding different people's moods when they are speaking. Are they mad, being sarcastic, being silly, judging, mocking? One would think that Mary and Martha might be mad at Jesus, but it doesn't appear so. They trust him implicitly, but they also miss their brother. They know that Jesus could have saved their brother, but instead of beating him up, they accept the death with the knowledge that whatever Jesus is doing and has done is right. Even though it feels horrible.

That is what I see in Mary. Is that what Jesus responds to? The sheer pain? The trust in spite of the pain? Does Jesus identify with that loss, because he feels that loss moment by moment for millions of his dead and dying brothers and sisters, and likewise God for his children? How bittersweet. Pain is part of life. Love comes with pain. Pain is a part of love. Grief is something we all share. It is not a failing, a weakness, or something to be hidden. It is part of living and loving and sharing yourself with others.

Life is a daring adventure or nothing. ~ Helen Keller

I was looking for a "God is good" verse, and I randomly found this quote online today. I think it perfectly describes where I have been. I was doing nothing, wallowing in self pity, and generally disgruntled. Now, I have rediscovered the answer, and it is amazing, terrifying, and perfectly wonderful all at the same time. Following God will definitely be an adventure. But God is good. Today is Sunday so I went to church, and I literally saw some of the lies that I had been fostering and cuddling completely crushed. A dear friend asked how I was doing and mentioned that she had missed seeing me and was worried I had left. People that I used to revel in loving on suddenly reappeared in my space so that I could pick up caring for them where I had left off. Students I thought I had neglected and done a disservice took the time to thank me for helping them. IT WAS AMAZING! God has a place for me! He has put people in my life for a reason and I can't ignore that! I am not alone! I have had and can have a positive impact on the lives of others. :)

I was panicking on the way to church and a little last night about all of the changes that need to take place in my life, but then I realized that it will be okay! "God will make a way where their seems to be no way." I can do this if I trust Him! Well, I guess, He can do this! :)

Jeremiah 24:6-7 (NIV) - "My eyes will watch over them for their good, and I will bring them back to this land. I will build them up and not tear them down; I will plant them and not uproot them. I will give them a heart to know me, that I am the Lord. They will be my people, and I will be their God, for they will return to me with all their heart."

The Power of Faith; The Power of God

Colossians 3:3-4 For you have died and your life is hidden in Christ. Therefore consider the members of your earthly body as dead to immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and greed which amounts to idolatry.

The word for consider can be translated as "to make dead, to put to death, slay; worn out (impotent); to deprive of power, destroy the strength of."

(Quote and define appears to be my MO. )

Our sinful nature is dead! We have to believe that everyday, every moment. If we believe that sin has no power. Christ has destroyed, killed death and sin, therefore when we chose sin we are wallowing in rotting flesh. NASTY! Why are we drawn to that corpse when all that is light and good is before us, is wrapped around us in Christ? In my mind I see a small child peeping out from behind the folds of his mother's skirt staring at a fire, or something equally as dangerous, and then choosing to reach out and be burned, to scorch their sweet baby fingers because they have misunderstood the desirableness of the fire and the danger it presents.

If we truly believe that our sinful nature is dead and that we are "being renewed to a true knowledge according to the image of the one who created [us]" (Col 3:9-10) the deceit of sin should be obvious to us. Sin should not be shiny. It should not be an alternative, but simply a sad oddity that we do not let effect us.

Our sinful nature is DEAD! It has no power! We are being renewed to true knowledge! These are facts. These are accomplished acts of GOD! Let that knowledge free us father.

Quotes from NAS - Strong's

Timing

God's timing is perfect(and here I do mean perfect.) He gives us what we need when we need it. I decided to turn the fire extinguisher on the flaming bowl of crazy about 4 days ago. I started a bible study that is being done in community at my church, and even though I was jumping on the band wagon a couple of days late, each of the passages was exactly what I needed in my vulnerability. The pin was taken out of the extinguisher when I stopped focusing on my own needs and looked at others. That evening I started the study. The words of the first lesson, (written by a dear, sweet friend) spoke directly to my heart and to the stumbling block of my entire situation. She wrote about overcoming our sinful nature and why it is so easy to sin. "After all, our old nature is natural. It's tricky. If something feels right it must be right. So we believe lies...We don't naturally recognize truth, so our only hope is to spend time in God's Word." I had stopped listening and started ignoring God and my friends. I had started to listen to myself and to doubt, fear, disgust, pride. I was feeding myself lies on top of lies about my worth and my situation.

That evening, I emailed a friend bearing my soul and confessing the sin that was part of the crazy. All day the next day I worried about what she would think of me as I waited for her reply. That day the topic of the devotional was trusting the Lord and not in man. The call was to put aside our people pleasing tendencies and trust in God to provide all of the validation and goodness, everything we need. Even if she had rejected me because of my behavior it would not have mattered, because although she is dear to my heart, she is simply a person. She sins just like I do. God will never reject you or me as we live on this earth. He always loves us whether we love Him in return or not. If we ask Him to He will always forgive and forget. He will pull us into his arms and up onto his shoulders to carry us through life.

Perfect?

NAS

James 1:2-3 "Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. "

Does perfect mean perfect? The Strong's definition of the word translated here as perfect is "brought to its end, finished", "wanting nothing necessary to completeness", "perfect" "that which is perfect; consummate human integrity and virtue; of men-full grown, adult, of full age, mature."

Complete is defined as "complete in all parts, in no part wanting or unsound, complete, entire, whole; of a body without blemish or defect, whether of a priest or of a victim; free from sin, faultless, complete in all respects, consummate."

I don't think we are talking about perfection here as we imagine it. I think we are talking about being what God wants us to be where he wants us to be. This is about understanding the sovereignty of God. Understanding that God is in control and living in His time. Endurance is defined as "steadfastness, constancy, endurance; not swerved from his deliberate purpose and his loyalty to faith and piety... a patient steadfast waiting for; a patient enduring, sustaining, perserverance."

Perfection is not being anything a person can imagine. It is about letting God love you while the flaming bowl of crazy simply becomes a bowl of something satisfying and steady. It is about letting God love you still when the bowl is tipped again. It is about seeing God in those fluctuations and waiting and listening for his reaction instead of trying to right the bowl yourself.

I don't think I am done with this... but I am done for now.

also all Strong's definitions from www.crosswalk.com and of course Strong's

Claiming and Reclaiming

Recently my life has been a flaming bowl of crazy, but it is not necessary that you know the intimate details of said "crazy" at this point of the journey. Suffice it to say I have chosen to forget that God is good, that he "has a plan for me," that I can trust Him, that He is God. You may not believe in God, but He is going to change my life. That is after all what he does. I am claiming the promises that I have not forgotten but have simply ignored because I hurt too much. I am also choosing to reclaim or perhaps reappropriate part of a rap/pop song. This is me jumping in the car. This is me going on a road trip with God and letting him drive. This is me becoming reacquainted with an old friend, a friend that loves me and wants me. One thing "the crazy" has taught me is that if you don't pay attention to God you can't begin to understand Him or yourself. So here's to self discovery and self denial and chasing God.

ESV

Philippians 1:6 "And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ."

Philippians 3: 12-14 "Not that I have already obtained this or am already perfect, but I press on to make it my own, because Christ Jesus has made me his own. Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do forgetting what is behind and straining for what is ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus."

That verb for press is the same verb you would use to describe pursuit, both the good and the bad kind. Think of the intensity the bad guy or the hero always displays in thrillers. They always end up rushing towards something without a care for themselves. They forget themselves in the moment. I want to forget myself, my drama, in my pursuit of Christ.

http://www.hillcountryut.org/