Fear and Loathing

John 16: 13-14 "When the spirit of truth comes, he will guide you into all truth, for he will not speak on his own authority, but whatever he hears he will speak and he will declare to you the things that are to come. He will glorify me, for he will take what is mine and declare it to you."

When the spirit of truth comes, he will... he will not... he will... he will... he will... he will...

These are promises. Promises made by Jesus, by God. By the creator of the universe. By the one who made it possible for my mind to doubt. I have been terrified of listening to the Lord. That I might misinterpret what he is telling me, that I might not do something he wanted me to do, that I might fail him. Which, of course, I have already done, and he has already forgiven. The last two days I have not been very excited. I lapsed into old habits of wasting time and ignoring more pressing decisions that I have put off for fear of making the wrong decision. There is, however, a point at which you have to walk by faith. A point at which we all have to trust to God and believe that "he will guide" us. I have put too much and too little emphasis on listening to God. I have belittled myself and God, by assuming that I would not be able to follow any directions he might send me. There are lots of different ways to listen to God. Some times he speaks audibly and sometimes, we are moved by the spirit and there are no words. I need to stop freaking out about my role as a listener and start living in the freedom that Christ has purchased for me. The holy spirit will declare to me whatever it is God would have me to do. The holy spirit will teach me to "be still, and wait." God will give me the strength to do what he asks. I simply have to trust him.